Thanksgiving Eve

 Today is the 4th day of the 48th week, the 27th day of the 11th month, the 332nd day of 2024, and:

•  Ascension of ‘Abdu'l-Bahá
• Blackout Wednesday - AKA Drinksgiving or going binge drinking before turkey day.  Doesn't sound like a great idea to me because then you are dealing with family AND a hangover..  OTOH, if you are alone on the day, why not?   
• National Bavarian Cream Pie Day
• National Craft Jerky Day
• National Electric Guitar Day - just don't fall for rip-offs
• National Family Caregivers Day - pretty much everyone can rise to the occasion during an emergency.  The real heroes are fewer,  the ones that can be there day after day, knowing things are only going to get worse, without losing themselves or the love they have for the person needing care.  
• National Jukebox Day
• National Pins and Needles Day
• Pie in the Face Day
• Slinky Day
• Spitegiving - someone giving you a hard time about something?  Make a donation in their name to a charity or organization in their name and post the receipt online for all to see.  For example, getting grief about being pro-life?  Make a donation to Planned Parenthood in their name....
• Tie One on Day - we're talking about an apron here, what did you think it was about, eh?
• Turtle Adoption Day
• What Do You Love About America Day
• and Voyager 1 is ~23h 01m 51s of light travel time from Earth

Quote of the day:

"Treasure the love you receive above all.  It will survive long after your good health has vanished."

~  Og Mandino, American author and salesman

I had hoped that bossman would close the office today, and let us all work from home, thus avoiding the horrendous travel traffic.  While two people requested and were allowed to work from home, the rest of us trekked in.  I did tell my direct report that she could leave early at 2 PM though.  We are very lucky to have the day after Thanksgiving off, so it will be a nice long weekend.

A couple of articles came up today about the return to the office mandates being handed down by larger companies, and the toll that takes on their employees.  I continue to believe that impetus is being driven more by the owners' commercial real estate portfolios and their perception that they need to "see" employees to know they are working rather than a concern about productivity.  On the other hand, I agree that younger folk just entering into the workplace need more exposure to existing personnel in order to settle in, so I agree that a hybrid schedule is a good compromise.

Tomorrow is a holiday, a time when family traditionally gets together.  It is one that for me always belonged to Grandmom Hughes, and I remember those days fondly.  My son-in-law is cooking again this year.   Last year was a lot of work for him and he was not a happy camper, so I checked with him rather than just assuming he would, but now I am in a bit of a quandary entirely of my own making.   It just feels rude to assume I am invited, but then again, it is a family gathering so why do I need a specific invite?   In all the years I went to Grandmom's, I never remember getting a specific invitation - none of us did.  We just showed up!  So why do I feel like I need one this year?   I'm guessing that feeling tentative about my welcome has more to do with my own state of mind these days.  

I know I've mentioned before that this place does not feel like home yet.  The relocation has unsettled me more than I expected...   well that's not a fair statement because I never expected any emotional blowback from moving.  I mean I knew my anxiety level was very high before the move due to all the things that needed to happen and the cost, and I expected that.  I knew I was going to be concerned about budgeting since my living expenses took a leap upwards.  I as concerned about how Triscuit would adjust to the new place.  But I didn't expect to feel so displaced after everything was done.  I noticed right away that I was feeling off, but I assumed once it was all unpacked and I was fully settled in, I would be fine - and I'm not.   I'm not sleeping right and my appetite is off kilter.  This is totally unexpected, and I honestly am struggling to understand.  I mean I get that my routines have all been upended after 15 years, and I pine for the old #veiwfromthebalcony, but this place is just so much nicer than what I had at The Enclave.  It isn't like I left behind a cadre of friends - I didn't even know my neighbors - so why do I feel so intensely alone and isolated?  

I don't know.

Now the holidays are pressing in, and I'm not sure how things will go - will the bustle heal or just distract or aggravate the sadness?  It will be busy of course.  Weather permitting,  Friday I will go to the MD Christmas Show, then have a late lunch at the Cracker Barrel.   Saturday and Sunday will probably be chores.  My son is coming to visit in two weeks for a whole week [December 9th to the 16th] and that is totally awesome as he hasn't been home since he started chemo.  I have some Christmas shopping yet to do, and then everything has to be wrapped.  I haven't decided about decorating for Christmas other than hanging my wreath on the door this weekend - it isn't like anyone will come and see and then it all has to be taken down afterwards, a process that always depresses me

I don't think I need to look 

Mind you, I do not regret moving one little bit - the situation at The Enclave had become too unstable and I needed to make a change sooner rather than later.  

It's just that dealing with this unanticipated down on top of the election and the family issues feels a bit much at the moment..