Day 228 - everyone in

 Today is the 4th day of the 33rd week, the 16th day of the 8th month, the 228th day of 2023 [with only 130 shopping days until Christmas], and: 

  • Congressional Startup Day
  • Gozan no Okunibi
  • Independence Day - Gabon from France in 1960
  • Joe Miller's Joke Day
  • National Airborne Day
  • National Bratwurst Day
  • National Medical Dosimetrist's Day
  • National Roller Coaster Day
  • National Rum Day
  • National Tell a Joke Day
  • Surveillance Day
  • True Love Forever Day
  • World Calligraphy Day
  • the new moon as of 5:38 AM EDT
Quote of the day:
"Who included me among the ranks of the human race?"
~ Joseph Brodsky, poet and essayist 

I worry.  

Goes along with the tendency to overthink things.  Not that worry changes anything, mind you, nor does it particularly help my wellbeing or balance, but it is an activity I find myself doing even when I determinedly declare I am not going to do.

I worry about my family.  Both kids are going through so much and there doesn't seem to be anything I can help them with.  I worry if that means I am a bad mother.  

I worry about being able to keep working, especially if bossman declares that everyone should come back into the office five days a week.  I worry if he does that, he will use my obvious reluctance to come in as part of his reason.  I worry that I have damaged my working relationship with the only coworker who has been here the entire time I have.  

I worry about my health and seethe over the inability to find out what ails me.  I don't want to hear "you're old, fat, and out of shape" as an excuse for low sodium levels and edema and being short winded.  I've been old, fat and out of shape for years and these problems started one year ago   

I worry about my blind friend, who wants to stay out of assisted living and in DC.  She asked about moving in together, and didn't like my answer.  To do that we would have to hammer out solid financial boundaries, she would have to accept my cat [because I am not subjecting a rescue cat to another rescue as long as I have a choice in the matter], and we need to establish what our expectations are. 

I worry about those two young men who were unconscious when they were taken out of their burning apartment Sunday a week ago.  

I worry about my country.  I'm tired of all the old rich white men telling everyone how to live their lives and I despise the authoritarianism that seems to be so prevalent.  Also I don't understand a good portion of those people who seem to live in an alternate reality.

I worry about the world.  Climate change.  pollution.  war.  fanatics.  corruption.  technological changes being implemented without knowledge of the consequences.  

I worry.  

What I need is an off switch - nothing permanent, just something to turn off my mind long enough to get some respite and unwind

Back to my 2nd life[s] and ignoring the real world.

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