Day 165 - commuting causes reflections

Today is the 4th day of the 24th week, the 14th day of the 6th month, the 165th day of 2023, and:

• Army's Birthday
• Chop Suey Day - this summed up my experience with Chinese or Japanese food when I was growing up.  Never cared for it and I was delighted to discover the rich variety of cuisine available
• Family History Day
• Flag Day  waving proudly since 1777 
• Hydranencephaly Awareness Day  - babies born with this congenital defect seldom survive but it can actually develop in adults, usually over 60, and is believed to be the cause of about 5% of the dementia cases 
• International Bath Day
• National Bourbon Day
• National Cucumber Day
• National New Mexico Day
• National Strawberry Shortcake Day - the food not the doll   Little bit of family history - my daughter loved those dolls and collected them.  She would bargain with her brother over the Atari games - if he would play the Strawberry Shortcake game [which he detested] then she would play whatever game was his current favorite.  If he wouldn't, then he got less gaming time because the rule was equal time for both of them.  It worked, most of the time
• No Mailing Children Day [I guess because yesterday the USPS banned it] - still fascinated me tho.  I mean, most parents won't even let their kids walk to school or wait at the school bus stop alone these days!  
• Own Your Share of America Day - the name of a successful public relations blitz back in the 1950's by different broker agencies to convince folks to invest in stocks.  A lot of folks got stung as reversals caused losses they couldn't afford, and nowdays the only stock held by the hoi polloi are in the 401K programs  
• Pause for the Pledge Day
• Pop Goes the Weasel Day
• World Blood Donor Day

Quote of the day:

"The act of writing requires a constant plunging back into the shadow of the past where time hovers ghostlike." 

~ Ralph Ellison, Writers at Work

There something about driving to work that gets your mind running in different channels, something similar to being in the shower, assuming you aren't listening to the radio/podcast/audio book, singing, swearing at the other drivers, or talking on the phone,  This morning's line of thought started thinking about the work day, and chores that need doing about the apartment, and then wondering when I would take the time to write, then if what I am doing can be called 'writing'.

That is a reflection I often revisit.  

Blogging can be very similar to writing in a diary or journaling if you let it be that way.  Or it can be a series of essays - Substack is full of very well written blogs that are actually a series of essays, each one informative enough to have paying customers and even get quoted by mainstream media at times, and some have subscribers that pay for the privilege of ready their exclusive content.  [I find that more than a little annoying while also being envious, and it gets me started about how being truly informed is going to start being the purview of the well-off soon - which is a topic for some other time].  This particular blog seems to be a jumble of babbling, without a clear path or purpose, rather like a do-it-yourself autobiography that opens a window into the life and times of one Carol and her 2nd life[s].  But is it 'writing'?

When I was in elementary school, I created a pen name 'Veronica Riley' that I was going to use for my literary works [oddly, a name I have never used for my 2nd life].  Sure I would work - I was going to be a teacher - but what I really would do was write.  I wrote poems and short stories and fan fiction, journaled, and sent pages and pages to pen pals.  When I was in college, I got to meet Issacs Asimov.   He gave a short lecture , then took questions, gave out a few autographs [I got one], and was turning to leave.  I said out loud "but what I would like to know...." and then I stopped because he stopped and looked at me.  "What would you like to know?" he asked.  Looking into his eyes, I went inarticulate.  I couldn't figure out how to ask him how he knew he was a writer, how he learned to let that huge volume of word flow....  I stammered "how do you find a publisher?" and he just glared at me, said "I publish my own books" and left.  I felt so deflated and disappointed in myself - for one brief moment I had a chance to have a conversation with a writer that I read voraciously, and I had blown it. 

College life ground on to its inevitable conclusion.  And then, I got married and had a baby.  And I stopped writing.  

The poems and the stories are gone, lost in the different moves and changes of my life.  I blogged intermittently, both personally and professionally when I started speaking about KM in banking, from about 1995 but the writings were all lost, as I explained on this blog's first post March 3rd, 2011.  What brought me back to blogging?  I had been writing in a personal journal since the beginning of 2010, first using Penzu, then Blogger, and suddenly realized that instead of posting long threads on Facebook or Twitter, I could join my thoughts together and restart Banking On Tomorrow.  I still pay for the domain name, but haven't done anything with it, but I keep thinking one day I'll create that website [or pay someone to do it for me, more likely] and post my babbling there.....

But, am I a writer?  

Do I need an answer to that question?

And does the answer to that question change my resolution?

Good thing I have a short commute, isn't it?